My heart has been stirring this weekend with happiness.

I have these random moments where I would catch myself smiling and the smile connected to my heart. The connection created this feeling that I’ve had on repeat since moving to Oregon: thankfulness.

I haven’t written a lot about my happiness.

Ever.

Writing came more naturally as a therapeutic measure to release hurt and confusion. I often turned my thanks only to praise and one on one with God. Sometimes I even think my happiness isn’t what people want to hear. Happiness, I think, misplaces some people. It can make people feel left out, forgotten, or insignificant if they are not a part of that happiness equation.

But I’m about to make this post about me & this insatiable happiness that strikes me often here.

{Do I even need to say that being 800 miles from home & 1,000 miles from some incredibly close family & friends catches me off guard ocassionally? Well, it does. And I cry in those moments. It’s true.}

So here I am, in Oregon.

I have spent the last 6 months beneath a warm sun I wished would go away while I begged the question, “where is the rain and cloud cover I have only dreamed of?”

This question sets me apart from true Oregonians, apparently, but I’m still on a foreigner’s visa status here not knowing what seasons look like and thinking rain is magical! However, finding myself beneath plastic tarps on Mississippi dining from food carts while thunder cracked and buckets dumped overhead was a match to my life-tourist heart.

I am set on fire by the unknown and feeling small.

I live for moments where I know nothing of my surroundings and feel a bit of uneasy fear at the red letter O(utsider) being freshly tattooed on my head. Red & 3-D ink blazing, I ache for it. Oregon makes me feel like that.

I study districts and make lists of dream-do’s and I try to make them happen.

Give me tourist attractions and the hidden gems.

Let me feel the venue floor pound beneath my feet while the band opens their set.

Scoop me up a cup of the odd flavored ice cream I’ll never order again but I’d only taste here.

{Don’t pour me a glass of Oregon wine. I’m a California girl & nothing compares}

See–I’m still ME! I have my heart & I have my adventure.

I remember and love all of the chapters written before and I am LOVING writing these new chapters! THAT, my friends, feels magical!

I’m happy.