allegralove

This morning I found myself thinking about my Christian and Catholic background.

While I attended both Christian and Catholic church services in my youth, I ultimately clung to my Christianity and disbanded myself from Catholicism. Why? I didn’t walk away from the Catholic church out of malice, I just found that I fit better with Christianity. Mass felt formal, ritualistic, and disconnected from the God I know. The God I know doesn’t ask me to confess to a priest or do penance with a rosary, the God that speaks to me tells me I should come to Him; be in relationship with Him. Ultimately, I found that with the Christian church.

So today, I began to ponder why Catholic ritual didn’t appeal to me and I had this thought: can relationship exist without ritual? If relationship can exist without ritual, then I have lost nothing by disconnecting with Catholicism. If it cannot, then perhaps I am missing something that could be making my relationship with Jesus better.

My thoughts started racing. I thought about my relationships: husband, sons, family & friends. Certainly within them I existed without ritual. Or did I? Was I too caught up on the word vs. understanding the meaning?

Ritual as defined by Merriam-Webster means “an act or series of acts regularly repeated in a set precise manner“. It was easy to understand then that in the Catholic Church, ritual is relationship. There is a connection made, a commitment publicly stated, when you choose to be confirmed {or legally recognized through classes to be a part of the Catholic church}, when you light a candle and kneel to pray, when you drink of the blood and take the body during mass, or when you confess to a priest. Each of those rituals can connect a Catholic to their personal relationship with God and how they feel His presence.

I was beginning to realize, my ability to connect to my human relationships includes ritual every day. If I replace the word ritual with routine, it’s easy to see that it’s there: I routinely pick up my son from school and we talk about his day. I routinely relax in the living room with my husband to unwind from our days. Through tradition {annual routine}, I connect with my family at Christmas, with presents to celebrate birthdays, or decorating cookies with my friends. Tradition and routine {read: RITUAL} keep us connected. I had just blown the lid off something huge in my heart.

Until a few years ago, I hadn’t realized that hearing God’s voice isn’t something everyone has experienced. Knowing that I can speak with God and hear Him {even silence is an answer} is my routine connection with Him; my ritual. What I understood today is our human NEED to tap in and FEEL connected. While I do not need to see a priest to be absolved of sin, that may be how God reaches others. He is without limit and with eternal persistence, driven to reach us. I do believe that if a person is actively seeking His face, He will find them.

So am I missing something having disconnected from my Catholic background? For that matter, had I really come that far from it? I still hold close to my heart that tradition of advent, prayer, community, helping others, love, and Jesus. Of course, we can get fundamental here, but that’s not what I am after.

Ritual IS essential to relationship. Ritual IS routine. What one man prays of repetition is connecting to God despite what another may think. What one man gives to the church out of faith and acknowledgement that from Him all things flow is connecting to God despite another mans argument it’s unnecessary. Even Jesus practiced ritual/tradition/routine: He fasted, He washed the hands and feet of mankind, He broke bread and drank wine with His disciples. It is through ritual, through tradition, through routine that we maintain our connection to each other and to Jesus Himself.

Sometimes, all we need to do is hear one word that can make our minds shut down; for me it was ritual. Turns out, I just needed to change ONE word to understand the practice and correct some misconceptions.

….Anchor’s aweigh!